"never leave home without Betty & Pansy"!

Okay, okay. So Terry sent me an email and told me to stop begging. Apparently I finish every blog "begging" for people to send me emails. Though I feel that statement is a slight exaggeration, I will discontinue my strategy and put my potential for communication into the hands of the universe. As Emma would say, "Off you go".

Just to appease some small fears or concerns created by my last blog. It's all good. I am fine and dandy. Happy, healthy girl. Things at the studio are still in a bit of turmoil. Teachers are unhappy, new people arriving, familiar faces leaving. Negativity and gossip are quite familiar in conversation... but I have made the decision to not be involved. I am breaking off from the center and finding peace on the fringes. Teaching has been good. I have resolved the inner battle that I was having about being a good enough teacher. I realized that as long as I stick to teaching what I know and find inspiration wherever I can, then all will be well in the world. AND then ("No and then"... hehe) ...um... back on track. AND I am teaching so many new styles of yoga! Hot, Hot2, Flow, Gentle and now (as of two days ago) Restorative. I am multi-purpose... like one of those tools that Keary carries around in his back pocket.

I long for home a little bit - the people I love, my puppy, the food, being able to buy products that are familiar to me. So I have considered dropping all the mama-drama (I just like using that phrase... even when it doesn't apply) and hoof'n it back home. But really now, what would I do? Until I do the Jivamukti Teacher Training (which I WILL DO!), I am only certified to teach hot yoga... and the Moksha studios are generally booked up with teachers. No work for me. Of course I could always work at Starbucks... oh, oh or in the Eaton's center! But maybe that's not putting my skills to the best use. Plus I would get paid pittance for working every moment of my life. No, xie xie. I have considered applying to other studios in Asia (shhh, it's a secret)... Ryan's visitor visa will expire after these next two months, so unless he finds a job that will get him an ARC, we will need to rethink the situation. Really, who knows what the future will hold. As Michael Stone said (and I repeat on a regular basis), the future does not exist - it is a concept of the mind, based on our past experiences/preconditioned existence - live for the present moment. F'n brilliant, right there.

So that is me. Fully updated.

Other small things. I am trying to buckle down and practice every day (to prepare for the next teacher training). So far so good. I'm generally taking one (maybe two) days off per week... but getting 90 minutes of asana in almost every day. I'm also trying to meditate regularly, but I can only do so many things in a day. I decided to be gentle. You can't force these things without creating patterns of aversion and attachment. Easy does it. So pretty much, that's everything. Ryan will be spending the day today on airplanes and in airports, flying to and from Hong Kong. This means that once I finish this 12:30 class, I get the rest of the day absolutely alone. Can you imagine? Asia has not offered many opportunities for a girl to be alone. Fascinating really.

Terry, instead of this so called 'begging', I will leave you with this:

The ideal is to serve mankind while simultaneously meditating on the divine nature that man truly is. And even if you think he is not divine, serve him anyway. You will transform yourself in the process, from a self-centered to a selfless human being for whom the realization of the Divine, and of all Truth, will then become inevitable.