Time: 8:18am
What: 25 minutes asana / 20 minutes seated practice
Focus: Third Foundation / Exercises 13 - 15 (Sati-)
New set of focuses that further explore the Third Foundation of Mindfulness...
Exercise 13 | Observing the Desiring Mind
Aware of the various states of mind - desiring, not desiring, hating, not hating, ignorance, no ignorance, tense, not tense, distracted, not distracted, etc.
Exercise 14 | Observing Anger
Aware of anger and the roots of anger. Bringing softness and mindfulness to be the companion of anger. Learning to be present and skillful with anger as a mental formation.
Exercise 15 | Love Meditation
Using loving-kindness and compassion meditation as an antidote to anger.
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This blog post can be titled "New Puppy Meditation: Exploring Frustration and Anger". Funny how the new focus is bringing awareness to anger and life offers me situations in which to do so.
Our morning routine has, for obvious reasons, shifted to allow for our small and cute new family member. This morning, it looked like this:
Wake up to alarm and puppy chewing on face/pillow. Brush teeth (mindfully - as micro-practice), wash face, make coffee (mindfully). Clean up puppy's "business" from the night. Happy she used the newspaper. Feed puppy. Walk puppy. Have other dog owners stand too close and stare at you/puppy because they aren't allowed to socialize yet (puppy doesn't have all her shots). Feel small amount of frustration towards puppy's excitement and hyperactivity to the other dog within view but not reach.
Why can't the other dog owner leave us alone? Why is she staring? What is up with her angry dog? Why won't Ella just do her business?
Go inside with no "business-going" success. Puppy immediately does business on floor (narrowly missing newspaper). Adorable how she thought she was on the newspaper. Clean up mess. Repeatedly remove newspaper, socks, pillows, etc. from puppy's mouth and give her chew toy. Firmly and lovingly repeating, "No, Ella. Chew this." Drink coffee and eat breakfast with puppy nearby chewing on... everything.
Fast forward to me deciding to prepare for asana practice by placing puppy in blocked off kitchen (apparently, it's a good way to encourage her independence). Practiced asana to howling puppy noises. Practiced asana while puppy - now-escaped from kitchen - chews on face, hands, yoga mat. Respond with discipline - feeling escalating frustration. Pause. Take a deep breath. Continue to practice. Chew, chew, chew, bite. Anger, frustration. Gritting teeth. Tense in shoulders and jaw. Place puppy in bedroom. Go back to practicing. Puppy howling because, once again, she finds herself behind a closed door. Girlfriend goes back into bedroom and entertains puppy. Finish asana practice in quiet and... a tiny bit of guilt.
Next up... seated meditation. Girlfriend is up and starting a shower. Puppy chews on meditation blanket and my toes. Pain. More frustration and a little bit of sadness. I discipline her, "No, Ella. Where's your toy?" I bring my gaze back to the floor... Eventually, shower complete, girlfriend comes out and entertains puppy once again. I get to sit with the residue of tension and explore the roots of my anger and frustration. Finish seated practice with loving-kindness meditation as antidote to anger. Soften, soften, aware of breath. Feel the phrases. Mean them.
Decided that puppy discipline with be another addition to my micro-practices (or would it be a bell of mindfulness?). Will pause and take one fully aware breath prior to disciplining pups: 1) to be a better dog-caretaker, and 2) to maintain a level of sanity.
1 comment:
Just stumbled accross your post, and while I don't know a thing about meditation, I did write an article on my blog that I thought could help you with your pups chewing, that doesn't require discipline. You can check it out here if you'd like: Article On How To stop Puppy Chewing
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